TODAY'S // TRUTHS

• i thought this summer would feel different but it's proving to be a different type of challenge for me. i thought the down time would be a welcome vacation & full of fun ... but it's almost as much work as school. different work, harder even.
• i wish personal growth came with a fucking to do list or a manual so i could track how far i have come or measure how ok i am doing. 
• i'm trying to hold on to every single moment that makes me feel alive or full, sunsets at the beach, my niece & nephew laughing or holding my hand, the feeling after finishing a spin class, driving with all the windows down & the music really loud, being with my sister.
• i'm also taking mental notes about what doesn't make me feel good, things that i need to let go of & working on being brave enough to make those changes to remove the bad stuff from my life. one day at a time, it's complex & change is too.  
• i lost my drive to craft & i refuse to give myself a hard time about it or force myself into it. it's ok to take a step back and remember WHY i make & start again whenever i feel like it. 
• i'm working on being patient with myself & just breathing, trying to remind myself how strong i am and that it's ok. 
• i'm missing my camera but allowing myself the same creative freedom to love something so deeply but take a break from any sort of creative pressure it holds. photography will always be at the heart of me in such an emotional way that when i am going through change it will change with me when i am ready to utilize its expression. right now i just want to be & photography doesn't heal me, i heal me.